I don’t know how to react when traditions I have come to associate with suppression of female identity in the society are romanticised by the modern women. I have lost count of the number of women around me who rush to change their surnames on the facebook as soon as they get married. Or append it to their maiden surname in a weird attempt to be identified as a married woman while retaining their earlier identity. And then there is all the romance created around occasions like Karwa Chauth.
The name-changing is difficult to justify. I can’t fathom why women do that? So that their kids do not have a surname identity crisis?? If it is the romance of declaring the marriage, why doesn’t changing their relationship status suffice, as it does for their male counterpart.
The fasts and celebrations are justified by husbands also joining their wives in the rituals. And the festivals, which have traditionally been done just out of a sense of duty, suddenly gets such a romantic aura (Thanks DDLJ for the idea?? And the daily soaps for augmenting it day in, day out??). The gender issue should go out of the window in these celebrations then, right?
I don’t know why, but it doesn’t go out for me. It just feels like a pathetic attempt to justify what should have been thrown away in a modern society.
It’s a matter of personal choice, people would say. Who am I to dictate what should or should not be done?
Agree! I have no rights to dictate. And I don’t do so. But I have the rights to feel uncomfortable, to cringe! And I choose to voice it. Even at the risk of offending people around me.