What is wrong in being a homemaker?

Answer: There is nothing wrong in being a homemaker. BUT there is everything wrong is using it as a catch-all argument whenever a discussion around women’s professional life is going on.

I am sick and tired of this argument. The latest was a discussion on a show, where the leads have gotten married and after that the heroine is showing no signs of going back to work. Without getting into the details, given the story they have shown and the kind of character she has been made out to,  I don’t think it makes sense. I strongly felt that she should be shown going back to work. There are a few things in a show which can justify why she may not return a while, but that has not been cited as a reason yet. So, there was some debate going on around it. There were people who agreed to my point of view and there were those who thought it was not inconsistent with her character if she did not want to start working again. I did not agree with their reasoning, but that is fine. It is a matter of individual interpretation and opinion. And it is a fictional show after all.

But then the “Godwin’s law” equivalent of any discussion around women’s professional life happened. Somebody started  with “what is wrong in being a home-maker”, “homemaker’s is a 24/7 job and you don’t even get rewards immediately” etc. etc. What the hell! Nobody was saying that being a home-maker is wrong. People were only arguing that it did not suit the character or the circumstance. But this was a golden strike from the other side. I figured I would have to put more time in putting disclaimer against this general debate that actually debating the character and her decision. So, I called it quits.

It bugs me. This was just a fictional show and any India TV series is unlikely to remain logical for long. But the problem is that it happens far too often even when real life issues are being discussed. I wish I could somehow once and for all convey to all those “what is wrong in being a homemaker” banner holders that not all discussions about women’s career have to boil down to your question. So, can you please shut up and stop emotionally blackmailing people when nobody is arguing about your question at all?

If  a discussion happens on this post through comments, how long will it be before someone poses the same question? 🙂

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About Jaya

Jaya Jha is an entrepreneur, a techie, a writer and a poet. She was born and brought up in various towns of Bihar and Jharkhand. A graduate of IIT Kanpur and IIM Lucknow, she realized early on that the corporate world was not her cup of tea. In 2008, she started Pothi.com, one of the first print-on-demand publishing platform in India. She currently lives in Bangalore and divides her time between writing and working on her company's latest product InstaScribe (http://instascribe.com) with a vision to make it the best e-book creation tool. Blog: https://jayajha.wordpress.com Twitter: @jayajha Facebook: http://facebook.com/MovingOnTheBook

2 thoughts on “What is wrong in being a homemaker?

  1. On my part, here’s what I see that’s wrong with being a homemaker: It’s the bad example homemakers set for ALL women.

    Homemakers tend to make martyrs of themselves. Homemakers are seen to be all about ‘sacrifices’. They dont stand up and DEMAND the respect and rewards they deserve. And over time, they become unduly bitter about the very same things. And that makes “home-maker” looked down upon as a justifiable thing to do with one’s life.

    In India, homemaker hsa become just a hip word for housewife.

    In any other profession if you were treated as shabbily as most homemakers are, you’d revolt. Or quit. But no, homemakers happily become martyrs, even encourage it at times, and then cry about not ‘being given’ enough respect and appreciation. Setting a really bad example for all women – that it’s ok to be treated shabbily, that it’s ok and expected to be a martyr – after all, you’re a woman. You’re a homemaker.

    But if you can create a space where being a homemaker, you still are respected and appreciated as the person you are, as a significant contributor to society – not as a martyr, then yes, there’s nothing wrong with being a homemaker.

    Check out my not too unrelated post – the other side of the coin – about working women: http://richajn.wordpress.com/2011/01/31/why-are-there-so-few-women-leaders-at-the-top-of-the-workforce/

    and on the superwoman syndrome:

  2. Pingback: India: What Is Wrong In Being A Homemaker? @ Current Affairs

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