On the third Story
Posted by Jaya on May 7, 2008
Do you think there are people around you with mental problems? No, it does not mean, you have to have mad people around you. People suffering from depression, somebody with an abusive personality and a victim, a stalker? Or do all these seem like distant terms, nothing to do with our daily lives. Unfortunately the recognition of these kinds of problem in our society is pretty much non-existent, while these are more prevalent than we’d like to believe.
One such relatively less known phenomenon is that of abusive relationships. In India we like to think of it as a situation where women are oppressed, financially dependent, socially unable to break free of a relationship etc. But the personality disorder that leads to abusive behaviour in beyond social or economical situations. So, it isn’t that abusive relationships are confined to only particular situations. While it may seem totally irrational, there are totally independent women who stay in abusive relationships for long time. And the reasons can be complicated in such cases. For example, they may simply not realize that it isn’t going to be all right some day. And the abusive partners are not your typical TV serial villains, who are obviously evil. Usually there are some deep-seated reasons which make abusive personalities. These people may be abusive towards the very partners they love, while being perfectly normal, even charming otherwise.
So, that’s where the characters of my story come from. Unlike the earlier two stories, this one came more naturally in English. So, I hope I won’t see a request for translations.
Have I known people in an abusive relationship? Yes. Is it their story? No. I don’t know enough of their story - so even accidentally it could not have been their story. Nor is it intended to be. It’s a fiction, that I have attempted to write around a real problem. But having known such a thing, it scares me to think that something like this could be going on very close to you and you’d be able to do nothing except to guess and keep quiet until the victim speaks up!
May 7, 2008 at 9:33 am
Jaya,
I’ve been reading this blog for about one year. Gradually, you’re improving yourself in both expressig yourself and giving voice to public concerns. Now that you write stories,you’ve added another dimension to it.
My best wishes to you.
Regards.
May 7, 2008 at 12:44 pm
Do i know someone in such a relationship? Yes… Did i think of them when I read your story? Yes….. Will I be able to do anything for them? No…. unless, they speak for themselves! As a story, it sounded more like those stories in Greehshobha etc but, the issue raised is very pertinent… something so common around us that we tend to ignore it (the isue) by calling our society a male-dominated one!!